The Raven Republic Forums

I am me.


I am that which shapes the course of my own future, he who governs the pathways of life for this fleshly vessel.


I am one who values his solitude, reveling in the comfort of being alone with myself.


I am a being who has accepted the reality of my own imperfection, that which defines me as who i truly am.


I am the result of a medley of blood and genetic magic. A structure of body and soul, that which generations of humans have caused to be.


I am the product of twenty-three years of existence, an earthly existence which i have guided to where it stands today.


I am my own accomplishment, my feats measured in ways unique to myself alone.


I am what i am.


I am alive, i exist in this world.


I am totally bored.


BORED! GADSDEMET, BORED I SAY!

Rant: i lost my first online battle with a japanese guy, i didn't last 20 sec...wtf

Haha. When I get AC4, maybe I should reconsider becoming a cannon fodder first by practicing with R. Leondhart before I have the guts to fight those damn experts.



Rant:
Oh, damn that. Midterm ko na pala bukas. Bye-bye.

*crams*

My parrot barfed out the feeding tube

I am utterly afraid of insects and cockroaches are the ones I feared the most. Madilim sa kwarto ko at habang umiinom ako ng tubig may naramdaman akong parang walis tingting. Pagbukas ko ng ilaw patay na ipis pala ang lumulutang sa baso ko. I freaked out. Lasang sibuyas!

Chaos,I challenge you!!!

Rant:I lost my reputation as the white demon!!!

Rave:
The final chapter in Ultimates 2 is coming out tommorow.
<a href='http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i313/jonevangelist/Ult213prev.jpg' target='_blank'>http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i313/jon.../Ult213prev.jpg</a>
<a href='http://www.newsarama.com/marvelnew/Ultimate/13/Ult28pager.html' target='_blank'>http://www.newsarama.com/marvelnew/Ultimat...Ult28pager.html</a>
RANT: Wala pa yung bwisit na comics.
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Rant: Hindi SEGA ang nag publish
Rant: Wala pa yung PS3 version
Rant: Wala akong PS3

RAVE: The Cover is better than that ^&*(*&^&&*( 0**& US version.

Shoplift mo na yan JE. Wala naman nakatingin sa'yo.

Rave:
Yeah! My dad's home. Now I can finally turn the aircon for the whole day again.

HAHA walang laman yung naka display na case. Masama din ang tingin ni Tony Hawk.

Kamukha ni Tony Hawk si Weng Weng.

Rave: i got 5 consecutive wins in AC4, and i'm finally getting my own paintball gun, hehehe ^ ^

Paintball... I'm jealous.

So take me back
Back to better days
'Cause this time between
Is wasting me away
Story of the Year - "Take Me Back"


I sit alone in my room as i'm typing this, memories of days gone by flashing through my mind like so many falling raindrops. Memories of a time when i would drift off to sleep without having to worry about what tomorrow would bring me, memories of a time when i didn't have so many responsibilities or when i didn't feel as if i had to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. The more logical part of my mind tells me that these memories only happened between nineteen to five years ago. Yeah sure, because to me, it feels like several centuries have passed since the events that created these memories occured. You all know which memories i'm talking about, because we all went through it, every single one of us: memories of childhood.

To put it simply, i miss being a kid.

Here's the story: I was walking home from a trip to the store, crossing the three or so blocks that separated it from my place. About a block down the street, there was a group of kids playing. No, there wasn't anything weird or annoying about these kids, nor was there anything odd about their play. It was just some of the neighborhood kids on the street, enjoying a beautiful summer morning exactly like i had once done all those years ago. Maybe it was their shouts of joy, the innocent lilt of their laughter as they chased each other in a up and down the street. Maybe it was the simple look of pure happiness on their faces as they found one of their playmates hiding behind a parked car during a round of hide-and-seek. I don't really know what it was but i found myself standing there on the sidewalk, rooted there as if frozen in place, my eyes watching the activities that children so enjoy, the one thing that they can do best: being kids.

I never thought it possible but i found myself suddenly envious of those kids. It has been so long for me, years have passed since i had thought of playing like that, even longer since i had engaged in such activities. I missed the times when me and my friends would divide into opposing teams and wage imaginary war on each other, the times when a simple suggestion would have us tolling through the streets on our bikes. I even miss those hot summer days when we would go to the river, throw off all our clothes and just frolic in the cool water, not particularly caring whether other people could see us in our birthday suits. Watching those kids, i feel a sense of regret because i realized that i threw away my childhood far too quickly. I imagine what it would be like to be once again be a child. In my mind's eye, i see a small brown-haired boy emerging from within me, years of growth fading away as if a video was being played in reverse. The young boy that was once me joins the other children and soon the joyous peals of their laughter can be heard from blocks away.

Try as i might, i can't exactly remember when i made the transition from teenager to adult, or even when i left the safe waters of my childhood behind and moved into the turbulent seas that teenage life had in store for me. Back when i was still an adolescent, i was always enthralled by thoughts of what it would be like to be an adult, to go anywhere one wanted, to do anything whatever one pleased, at any time they felt like it. To someone as young as i was, being an adult was one of the coolest things possible, a sort of pinnacle that was to be desired and wanted. Shortly after entering high school, i decided that i would be like the adults in any way i could, never realizing that i was still young and still had a lot of years to go before i finished growing up. I wanted to grow up as fast as possible, plain and simple. Looking back now, i find myself laughing at that image of my younger self, at the delusions i had so thoughtlessly embraced. So it is true when they say that mistakes are easier seen in retrospect. And that a person's age can sometimes be gauged by how many they have commited.

Just great, judging from the number of screw-ups i've had over the years, i could easily be more than eighty years old by now.

I learned something today: there are some things in life, that once they dissapear, they can never be brought back. Among them are the days when one can go about life without a care in the world: the formative days that would eventually determine the person we will be when we reach the end of that path, crossing over into the nexus where so many different roads lead to the future. Contrary to what people often say, the truth can hurt. This one is no exception. It isn't quite the sharp sting of pain like the bite of a red ant or the quick lancing jolt you feel when you accidentally bite your tongue. Its more like a slow buildup, a sort of realization that steadily seeps into you, leaving you to wonder just where the years went. It's quite sobering actually, to realize that being grown up isn't all there is to life, that growing up is half the fun of being alive in the first place. Once you're an adult, your childhood is gone, irrevocably, irretrievably lost to the sands of time. All that you're left with are (hopefully) golden memories of those days.

I don't know how long i was standing there, watching those kids at play, letting memories i had long since forgotten once again come out like long-lost friends. It may have been only a few seconds or it may have been an hour but eventually i tear my eyes away from the kids. Regretfully, the little boy departs from his playmates and returns back to the recesses of my mind. I draw in a deep breath, holding it in for a few seconds before releasing it. With that sigh, i also release my angst, my disappointment in myself, my regrets and the sudden melancholy mood that has come over me, scattering them to the four winds. I shake my head and resume my pace, giving the kids a brief smile as i pass them.

And so, i'm left here, remembering the days when i was a child. I realize that i can never, ever go back to them. I can only re-live them in the safety of my memories. If only i had a chance, i'd turn back time in a heartbeat, all the way back. Sadly, i can't. We all can't. To those of you who, like me, are already in their twenties and beyond, we can only hope that we have lived our childhoods as fully as we could. To the younger ones, i would advice you to enjoy your youth as much as you can while it lasts. Remember that you're only a kid for the first eighteen or so years of your life, remember that once you're past that stage, you're an adult, all until the day you leave this mortal coil.

Choose life and then live. The future is waiting.

haha Adolescent
Pubic hairs hahaha!

I gave up on being child-like when I was about 8 or 10. I got hooked playing computers because of Tekken and Armored Core. Though I still have my childish behavior with me except for being child-like.


@ JE:
Gupitin mo kung gusto mo uli maging bata, JE.